I Have a Stomach Ache!

Stomach CrampsI was at the gym this morning when I heard one guy say to another guy, “Happy Holidays.” From his tone, he might as well as been saying, “I have a stomach ache.”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t quite that bad, but I mean his tone was, to be fair, flat, monotonous, thoroughly unconvincing. It was totally lacking in anything even remotely resembling a true spirit ‘o the season.

C’mon folks, if you’re gonna say it, say it like you mean it. If you aren’t feeling it, that’s okay! Better to say nothing, right? A simple “Hi” or “Bye” or “I have a stomach ache” will suffice.

There’s very few of us who get into a full-on, non-stop Holiday fever. (Symptoms include prolonged joy and good tidings lasting more four hours.) More typically, many of us experience an “up” feeling a bit more often during the holidays. There is nothing wrong at all with sharing your “up-ness” with any willing recipient. Thatsa nice.

But don’t fake it. Santa knows when you’ve been faking it, and you don’t need me to tell you why you don’t want that.

(Note: Yes, there are business or social occasions when spreading cheer is perhaps more mandatory than heartfelt. In those situations, you have a temporary license for faking it. At least try to “sell” it — put a little punch in it — but not so much that people can see through you. Or start whispering about how much punch you’ve had.)

So, all together now, like you mean it: Happy Holidays!

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